Eliminating Conflict In Your Relationship
It’s been said that it’s not disagreement that causes unhappiness, but its disappointment and anger. If we learn to eliminate those feelings in ourselves, not only will we be happier, but we can virtually eliminate conflict in our relationships since our partners will find it difficult to stay in conflict with us when we are loving and happy. So the key method of eliminating anger will be the subject of our current discussion ad hopefully this information will help you eliminate relationship problems.
Every time you find yourself becoming irritated or unhappy, take one of the following steps. They can be taken in any order and repeated as often as you like.
Be Quiet – Why would you knowingly destroy your own happiness or the love you want in your relationship? But that’s what you do every time you speak to your partner in anger. When you’re angry you will never say anything loving or productive, so therefore, when you’re angry, DO NOT SPEAK.
Be Wrong – You cannot keep up your end of a conflict when you admit that you’re wrong. When you admit that you’re wrong, the fire of the conflict will die for a lack of fuel. So any time you feel disappointment or anger, repeat, “if I’m disappointed or angry, I’m wrong” and you won’t be able to maintain those feelings for long.
Feel loved – Remember that you are loved. We become afraid in a conflict, and subsequently react in anger, only when we don’t feel loved. When we are absolutely certain that we are loved the disagreements and anger of other people are no longer threatening to us. If we feel loved we won’t become afraid and we’ll have no need to get angry.
Get Loved – Sometimes remembering that you are loved is not enough. You may need to feel loved in the present. You may need to call a loving friend and experience the love personally to eliminate the anger. Find someone who you can talk to honestly and tell the truth about yourself and create the opportunity to feel love unconditionally.
Be Loving – Do something loving. Eliminate your anger by choosing to do something unconditionally loving. Perform an act of service, have a friendly conversation, thank your partner, touch your partner, tell him/her you love them. When you’re angry at your partner, you may not feel like doing something loving for him or her. But if you do it anyway, you’ll create an opportunity for both of you to feel the miracle of love in your lives.
